An open letter to those who, like me, feel like they are stretching their limbs. Perhaps for the first time.
To whom it may concern,
You have probably been told, many times throughout your life, who and how to be. Over and over you have been told 'not quite like this' and 'more like that' and 'less of this' and 'you are too much too much too much' and also 'never ever ever will you be enough'.
You have been forced into a square or a triangle or whatever shape is uncomfortable to you. We were told to be flat and dimensionless and we thanked them for their lessons and the attention we mistook for love.
But it doesn't have to be this way.
There is no one way to be and if you feel like the whole world and your whole life is too much, that is because it is, and that doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you. It means that maybe you are finally able to break free of your square or triangle or whatever shape is uncomfortable to you. And it's not going to be easy and it's going to hurt, but it'll be better and it'll be the hurt of stretching and rolling muscles long unused and no, no, no, your trauma did not make you stronger, but you might make you stronger.
You are stretching your legs and your limbs and your thoughts and your words, and you are seeing that you are multidimensional, a tesseract, and you were never meant to be defined by a handful of words and labels.
Maybe you too will find that no one can tell you who and how to be, not even you. Because you are too much person for one body to contain, let alone for one mind to define. Maybe you too will find that there are no answers, only questions leading to questions.
And you get to follow this path of question crumbs all the way into the deep dark forest. And maybe you too will find a witch's hut there and not be afraid, but rather feel at home. Maybe you too will find that the very best thing you can do there is tend to the fire and watch the seasons change and make art and sing song that are secretly spells and meet people over steaming mugs of tea who ask questions and offer no answers.
And maybe not. Maybe you will find something else uniquely you. And it will be better and it will be true.
* Credits for this piece: It was Charlie Claire Burgess (The Word Witch) who described themselves as a tesseract (in relation to gender) on their Instagram and it stuck with me ever since, which is undoubtedly how it ended up in this letter. I tried to find the post, but I couldn't, but you can find their Instagram here.